5th June

I’m working up in London today at Lords and I don’t have to be there until 3pm so I’ve got most of the morning to myself.

First I pop into the solicitors office so I can show them how gorgeous I am……sorry I mean that I look vaguely like my passport photo.

I then spend some time looking for documents from when we bought the house 7 years ago. I find the file in my wardrobe and pull out relevant stuff and then decided I should look in the shed as well. I decided that a cup of tea is in order so I make one and take it out to the shed along with some biscuits that some students bought us. I unlock the shed and go in. I put my tea on the desk and pick up my mandolin for a quick strum. I’m about 5 notes into The Rolling of the Stone when an awful smell assaults my nostrils. “Why can I smell cat shit” I think to myself! Then I look at my shoe and it’s covered. There’s also a load on the doormat. SO I have to put everything down and wipe my shoe on the lawn. Then I go back to the house and take off the affected shoe before hopping into the kitchen and grabbing some kitchen roll and baby wipes. The shoe goes back on and I go back and clean it up before repeating the process too get rid of the now shit covered tissues.

Back in the shed I have to light a joss stick to mask the smell and after all that I only found one relevant document!

After lunch I head off to the train station to catch the 13:15 to Victoria. I get my book out but after having read less than two pages I can barely keep my eyes open and end up falling asleep for most of the journey. I also end up getting to Lords 30 minutes early.

Once on site things don’t go well. There a small piece of staging but they’ve forgotten to send the legs so I’ve only got 6 inches to perform on! I start to get the camera out of the box and almost immediately notice that the plate that connects the camera to the tripod is missing. I search the boxes three times but it definitely not there so I have to phone the office and get them to send it up. The video cable that was ran in didn’t work. The power cable that was there also didn’t work. So by the time I went to plug in the sound feed I was expecting that not to work either but thankfully it did. Eventually the missing bit arrived and I managed to get set up.

My requests for coffee had been falling on deaf ears and I was starting to get very annoyed as there wasn’t even access to any water. The thought of spending till midnight on site without a drink wasn’t good. There didn’t seem to be any mention of food either – not even a plate of curling sandwiches or that old crew favourite lasagne! I’d just about resigned myself to going without when we were suddenly given one of the starters which was very nice. The main course followed but that wasn’t, apart from the sauce, as nice as it looked!

The dessert wasn’t served until after the end of the second lot of speeches and none came our way so I had to make do with some rather nice chocolates that were abandoned on some of the tables. The table next to the control desk had by this time no one sitting on it so I thought I’d blag a drink. I could just have had water but I swear I heard that bottle of red wine calling my name!

I went off to find the client and give her the video tape. She took one look at it and said “I’m not sure what I’m meant to do with that” so I asked he if she’d like me to digitise it and of course she said yes. So I put it back in my bag, grabbed a couple more choccies and headed off to find my cab getting away a whole hour early – result!

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